![]() I remember my friend Kevin, his dad dropped us off at the Seifert Center in this big minivan. I am extremely dating myself, but those were my first three CD purchases. I bought Misfits Collection 2, I bought Relationship of Command, and I bought The Art of Drowning. My friends and I had all just gotten into punk I don’t think we even knew what hardcore was at the time. It was 2002, so I was fourteen and I’d been grounded. It was at some kind of Stockton rec center? I kind of wanted to start with you telling me everything you remember about that day. I used to live in Oakland and my best friend lived in Stockton, so I have some visual memories of that place when I think about you going to your first show there. For a band that’s been credited with helping to shape a genre called “Blackgaze,” there’s still something to be said about lifting the darkness. It’s a story of survival anxiety, personal insecurity, unfolding addiction, and even a group recovery. I approached Deafheaven founder/guitarist Kerry McCoy with the idea of exploring these “silent partners” with me as a way to mark the tenth anniversary of their breakthrough album, Sunbather, and in spite of those sometimes difficult memories, he showed no hesitation in his willingness to walk back into those places with me-even when the light was less than flattering. For as long as I’ve been making records, I’ve carried with me the uncomfortable feeling of making something “permanent.” It’s not just the songs-although that, too, plays a role-but the inspirations, the feelings, the conditions, and the physical places that also find themselves folded into the permanent shape of an “album.” Nothing puts that into clearer focus than a milestone anniversary.
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